A comment my friend Kate left on my post about Christian Women has left me thinking this morning. She said the perfect Christian women need to be covered with mercy and grace as well, and that the need for control comes from a fear long ago of not having any. It was so right. The struggle comes in that hard saying of Jesus to love your enemies.
I really stink at that.
People have told me that I was good at that, but I am not. I learned performance behavior. Pretending you were a part of a family you weren't, dealing with a mentally ill mother, and acting like everything was okay when it was not. That has spilled over into how I deal with other people. When I try to love difficult people, it is generally in my own strength.
A few times I have had the Lord infuse me with a supernatural love that could only come from Him for people who were unlovable. I am sure He has done the same for others to allow them to love me.
It is so hard to love people who hurt your feelings, make you feel "less than", or seem to be irritated by your very existence. But I don't believe we get an exception with them.
Thanks Kate for the reminder.