One Foot in Front of the Other

The last few days have been an endless procession of resumes, online applications, faxing of pertinent documents and driving and driving and driving from place to place to place following lead after lead after lead, and chauffeuring around an unemployed husband who also happens to be quite sick. I have recited his social security number forwards and backwards and possibly at one point while standing on my head. I have schmoozed and used every bit of my womanly charms - which if you know me means I had to borrow a little from a real woman somewhere else! We basically still know nothing - but in the midst of total exhaustion, and a ton of frenetic energy that is driving us, there have been some pretty cool moments.....

• uninterrupted conversation with my husband, including a cheap-o lunch at Taco Bell - the most fascinating part of which was learning in great detail all about different types of welding - and I'm not being sarcastic
• whistling at him as he walked across the parking lot to put in an application and watching him walk a little taller, even though he turned around and said, "yeah right!"
• filling out an application for him, and having him say "it must be hard to live with me" - and knowing that it is, but he must be worth it
• hearing him tell the man at the Veteran's branch at the employment office that I was his best asset

This morning I was in such a panic that I just wanted to give up - throw in the towel - go back to bed and pull the covers over my head - lay down and die. Throughout the day my perspective has changed as I have had a really good day with my husband. It is like the Lord has tried to stop my world from spinning, directed one foot to step out in front of the other, breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out .......... even these days of turmoil are full of abundant life.