02 November 2007

Unburdening Myself

I feel in a funk today. There are lots of things that are weighing on me. I am not sure how to assimilate my thoughts in a cohesive manner - so I think I'll just make a list.
  • I have a 10 yr old son who would like me to be a playmate to him. I don't know where to start and I feel that I am failing here with him.
  • Financial burdens - everything is getting more and more and more expensive - from gas to groceries. Our income is not growing accordingly. In fact some of our income seems to be trickling in and I fear at times that it may never come. Each month I am spending money unnecessarily in late charges, etc. My husband needs to make a job change in order for us to progress financially - and he is very resistant to any change - whatsoever.
  • I am starting to miss my mom - or maybe miss the idea of having a mom. I can't always put my finger on what brings this longing to the surface - but this time I do. Yesterday I overheard the conversation of a new friend and her sister who are going on an out of town trip together to a large TX flea market - and I could feel the pang instantly. Nobody can fix this - it is just how it is, and sometimes I deal with it but once in a while it comes up.
These are the big things - but right now little things like grocery shopping, planning menus, staying on top of laundry, etc. has become more of a burden than just a natural, easygoing part of the day. Just writing about it seems to have helped.

5 comments:

  1. Pour yourself a big cup of tea and take a long hot bath. Either that or go for some chocolate. That usually makes me feel better about everything.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Writing is totally cathartic to me as well. I just ranted and ranted today and feel pretty dang good now.

    About missing your mom. That's a hard one. I miss my mom terribly sometimes and it's strange that I do! She's not a believer and I just dont know....she's my MOM, ya know?

    hope tomorow is better for you.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I love that you miss your mom even if she can't be what you miss.

    ReplyDelete
  4. As seems to happen between you and I, I am experiencing similar issues. I am floored by the increase of prices and the constant comments that our economy is thriving. Someone tell me, where is the thriving part?
    What I hear in your missing your mom is that you have wonderful memories, and I think that is so special.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I know what you mean! I have been stressed on so many levels lately. Journaling is supposed to be a stress reliever so at least you are taking steps in the right direction!!

    ReplyDelete

Awaiting your words......
♥ Juls ♥