29 September 2007

To Adulthood and Beyond

Do you know what it would be like to hold on to a rope dangling from a rocket? I have one child who has been ready to grow up since the day she was born. Being her parent and trying to hold her down without holding her back has been a challenge. To help her take the time and space she needed to grow up has been a source of much friction over her 16 year life, but I have insisted on a childhood for my daughter, knowing myself the damage done when this is denied. Yesterday it seems this lassoing a rocket is becoming less and less realistic - as she was hired for her first "real" job as a waitress. I am so excited for her because this is a job she has really wanted, and at the same time I hate to see my little girl grow up and enter the adult world. Paychecks, drivers licenses, a boyfriend, SATs. I miss the days of playdoh and Thumbelina, when the hurts were only as big as falling down, the challenges only as steep as learning to ride a bike, and the safest, most wonderful place in the world was on my lap. I'm not letting go of that rope just yet!


  1. Jewls, I was going to say *are you my mother* but I didn't want you to take it wrong BUT I am so there with your dd. I was born grown up, my mom tells me, I was never a baby, I was grown up and ready to be free from birth. I so get it from your dd's perspective and I'm sorry I don't feel the pain of the mother's perspective at this time. I know you are doing a wonderful job and the trust you have built is priceless. I won't go into my childhood but I made it, I'm free and nothing will hold me back.
    You are striving for balance and that is wonderful. This may seem hard to get in this short message, we can *talk* otherwise if you like. I remember some things so vividly and I especially remember my teen years like yesterday. I know my kids aren't there yet but it won't be long...

  2. I know what you are going through! That rope is harder and harder to hold on to. Gabe is talking almost every day about college and what he wants to major in. What happened to that little boy who wanted to be a truck driver - as long as I could ride with him?

  3. Don't hold the rope too tight. She is smart and capable and will do great as an adult. You have given her a solid foundation. I think it is awesome that she is willing to give up "playing" to work for her money and not expect it to be handed to her. It is also awesome that she is confident enough to get out there and try new things. You are doing such a good job that you are working yourself out of a job!

  4. *Sniffle* I miss those days, too!!!




  5. I remember how hard it was on my mom when I got my first real job and then when I got my first car.

    I have a few years before I'm there with my kids, but I know it's coming and I'm making the most of every day leading up to it.

  6. And she's rocketing away so well...nice steady trajectory...clean take off. Looks like a perfect launch.

  7. I was born grown-up too. In fact, I moved out and went to college by the time I turned 16!

    Zowie. What were my parents thinking?!

    They must've really loved me. But don't worry. I still go home even now. It is one of the bestest places to be.


Awaiting your words......
♥ Juls ♥