Things I Will Miss About Texas

I know that not all of my lurkers came out of the closet yesterday, but that's alright. You are still welcome here. I am going to try to get my blogging juices stimulated by some of your questions, the first of which being what I will miss about Texas.
This is a little bit of a difficult thing - one that cramped my heart with fear when we first decided to move to Texas. I would wake up with a cold chill of panic about just this thing. I may have to miss my daughter. Kendra has said that she may stay here in this area and go to college. I know that doesn't sound too horrible, but if she is unable to leave here now, I can't imagine that time and more roots and deeper friendships established that she will ever want to leave. I can't think about it too much just yet. There is a timing factor involved with the start of college and her 18th birthday and her getting her drivers' license - but I am trying to come to terms with the fact that she has a life to live and it is my job at this time to transition myself out of her way. But she by far would be the thing I would miss most desperately.
I would miss that spring starts in mid-February, right when you mentally think you cannot take one more day of winter. Wildflowers start to bloom, and the air gets full of that energy of new life bursting forth in all the trees and fields. There are some really nice trails to walk this time of year and I will miss them as well - especially the Sundew Trail which is where we most often traverse.
There are a few ladies that I have started to get to know better as well, now that we've decided to move, and my friend Melody who has been my companion in homesickness. It is difficult to share our lives together though because we live about 40 minutes away from them. We will always have the internet, email and Facebook. It will also be nice to know that they are nearby in case Kendra should need them if she has any trouble.
I will absolutely miss my house. I just love this 100 year old beauty and all of the charm. It really suits me. But without friends to fill the rooms, it is still lacking in spite of being my dream house.
I am sure there are other things I will miss, but these are the ones that stand out the most. Texas is not a bad place - and if I've given that impression at all in my blogging, please know that there is beauty to be found here and good people. West Virginia is my home, and nothing can compete with her place in my heart.

Happy About Texas List

Some of my online friends - in their loving way have been trying to encourage me to get a grip and take notice of the blessings in my life. This, I am sure is a bit harder for my IRL friends - people I have actually met, been to their house, slept with, showered with on missions trips, etc. to actually inspire me to because they miss and love us. An online community can be a terrific blessing to a person's life. For me the Radical Christian Unschoolers group that I belong to and several offshoots, Unschooling God Journey and a political discussion group have been lifelines. Literally.
Today we were challenged - our whole family to come up with a "happy list" - things that are good about being in Texas. Somebody suggested getting the kids involved and offering a prize to help them also break the negative mode we've all been in. Another friend offered to send us goodies if we each completed this list of 25 things each! I have finished mine - but because this is an exercise in thankfulness and contentment, I am going to keep working on it every day this week alongside my family.
Without further adieu, My Happy List:

1. great homeschool laws
2. my old house
3. longer growing season
4. front porch swing
5. room for everybody
6. gotten closer as a family
7. learned I am stronger than I think - it is OK to be alone (in process)
8. ditched the institution for a real relationship with God and others
9. found RCU and met some great online friends
10. my big comfy bed
11. watching Travis enjoy his extended family
12. learned to digital scrapbook
13. learned to make bread
14. the Sundew Trail
15. neighborhood walks as a family
16. spring wildflowers
17. big blooming bushes in yard - azaleas & crepe myrtles
18. family reunions for Travis
19. fireworks at Christmas
20. my big old kitchen island
21. beautiful house decorated for Christmas
22. 2 1/2 hour drive to Gulf of Mexico and Galveston beaches
23. free ferry rides
24. living near the post office
25. fireplace in the winter
26. mature shade trees

I'll add to this daily to let you see how we are doing. I want to post our entire list of 125 when we get it done!

Homesick Manifesto

I have had a lot of difficulties adjusting since we moved to Texas in May 2006. Most of them were well anticipated - as I was leaving the first long-term "home" I had ever had, and the friends the Lord surrounded me with to give me the family of his making, not biological but the ones with ties that wrap all the way around your heart, and are not easily undone.
There is a lot that could be said about all the places that I have lived. I counted them out once and there are more than 20 different towns in states up and down most of the east coast. My parents' divorce was the cause for a lot of it. My personal insecurities caused me to continue a lot of this pattern into my adult life. However, in 1995 after a three month separation, Travis and I settled in Harpers Ferry, West Virginia - and there we stayed for almost 11 years. I made the best friends I had ever had in my life. These were the people who gathered around when my babies were born, the ones who filled our home with their presence and prayer support when we were in need, rejoiced with us when something good happened, and cried with us when we struggled and suffered. They are the people who would leave toilet paper and laundry detergent on the front seat of our car when they knew Travis was out of work, and point at one another and shrug their shoulders unknowingly when asked about it to preserve our dignity. They are the ones who filled your life with great excitement and surprise in the everyday of it all, side by side. We would hang out in the wee hours of the morning together, play games, talk, laugh, debate. I finally had the family that I had always wanted. I knew moving away would be hard, but felt that we owed it to Travis to get to know his family and try to make a life where he wanted to be.
The thing is, being here has been hell. It isn't the place or the people, but it is truly that my heart is elsewhere. We haven't succeeded in building the family relationships that we had hoped to, and find that we are quite alone. Financially we are in the same boat. With the rising economy, I have realized that in a short amount of time, we will quickly be stuck wherever it is that we live with little life outside, unable to even afford a yearly trip home to the people we love and who love us. I feel that we have made every effort to transplant our hearts here and find that the soil is not conducive to establishing good, healthy roots. I feel that if we don't get back to the soil where we thrive, we will wither and die. The kids have made it clear to me that they feel the same way, which gives me leave to express it fully knowing that I am not the only one who knows that this is not where we belong.
No whining, just a statement. This is my manifesto - my proclamation to the world - I don't know how, and I don't now when, but I am going home.

Anniversary

Two years ago today we sold our little house in the Blue Ridge Mountains and headed for the Lone Star State. It is a bittersweet anniversary. It was such a hard thing to say goodbye to my own "little house in the big woods". Having moved so much as a child, I had lived in the same town for over a decade, and in the same house for almost seven years. This was a huge thing to step away from, and continues to be to this day.
This past weekend two young people that I love dearly had their graduations and we weren't there to celebrate with them. Heart wrenching really, but unproductive to dwell on. Life has always had markers - times of happiness and times of pain. In each season, God's faithfulness to us has been the prevailing theme. Even during this time of feeling very isolated from those that I hold so dear - wondering if they remember that their places in our hearts are secure even if our seats at the dinner table, the party, the restaurant, the road trips are otherwise occupied for this season.

Interesting that this is Memorial Day as well. We arrived in Texas in the wee hours of the morning on Memorial Day. While it is a military holiday, it is also a marked memorial in our personal lives. I'm reposting this video of some fun times during our first visit home with our friends - just cause I'm missing them today. We really don't know how to say goodbye - so we just won't - ever!

Well I'll Be Hog-Tied

It seems we have a neighbor who "has hogs". A great deal of excitement broke out about an hour ago as men we didn't know were running through our yard, and my husband came in and said they were chasing hogs that had gotten loose. This is something you just don't see in West Virginia. A new bit of Texas culture ever waiting my exploration. I went outside for a bit - it is pretty dark and after the first horribly loud squeal - I decided I would watch through the windows. There is still a hog hunt going on. I'll take my hog on a plate in the form of bacon, thankyouverymuch!
My neighbor Debra said they came into her husband's woodshop in the back of her house and made themselves a bed and laid down. Supposedly she has pictures - and if I get my hands on them I'll post them just so you will know I didn't make it up!

Air Conditioning

I am reminded of the time when I was looking at houses, and talking to realtors from WV about houses for sale in Texas. I was inquiring as to whether or not a particular house had air conditioning since the online listing did not include this information. In a thick southern drawl, the realtor said, "Baby, thay-us is Tayksus. Ever-thang has air con-dish-uh-nang."
Oh really? Not quite the truth - but close.
I have seen a family of 17 in the front seat of a pick-up truck with the windows down in weather that feels like you're on broil in an oven. You see little houses where people are sitting on the porch, front door wide open in the evenings fanning themselves to keep cool. So not quite "ever-thang".
We have joined the ranks of the not so air conditioned in Texas, and let me tell you - it is miserable. Thankfully we have the one little unit in my bedroom, and that is where I shall stay until we get it fixed.
The AC repairmen came earlier and said that our coil needed cleaning. Excuse me? I don't have a coil. Oh you meant my air conditioner? At any rate, it is a bigger deal than just charging the thing up. Travis and our neighbor Tom are going to work on it tonight. I hope they are able to get it done - otherwise, we'll have to come up with $200-250 to get it done. Yikes.

Don't Try This at Home....in Texas

Yeah, this is a repeat lesson. I went out yesterday and watched the kids swim at the lake in a friend's neighborhood. They had a pretty good time. I sat and visited with the other moms. It was a fairly overcast, shady day. Outside of maybe the last 15 minutes, we didn't feel or see the sun. Ah, but it was there - spiraling invisible UV rays down through the clouds. And it fried my nose and forehead. Ugh. I love this "T-zone" sunburned look. The good news, it turns out is that the UV protection of my sunglasses works perfectly, adding to the raccoon effect. Lovely.

Kaleidoscope

A few things.
Went to the doctor yesterday - she said I have come to Texas to die.
Well she didn't say exactly that - but evidently although I have not really had seasonal allergies before - viola! I do now. it is settling in my throat, my nose, and now my chest.
The only sound emanating from my lips this morning is a squeak-like sound that can't actually be considered words.
When I tried to say Good Morning Kendra what came out was "ooh uh eeh uh". Fortunately she knows "squeak speak".
In further medical news, the UTI appears to be over. (I know you were all wondering.)

Although some may have country music aversions, that I myself am prone to from time to time, I have to share the link to this video of Trace Adkin's new song "You're Gonna Miss This" that my friend Carol sent to my daughter Kendra. Even though none of my family really knows my kids, we do have "family" that loves them and knows them so well even if we aren't related by blood. Carol knows that Kendra has been ready to grow up since she was born. Each year on her birthday she tells us how old she is going to be next year. This video was perfect - it was a great message for a little girl who grew up too fast. (She isn't grown yet.)

I used to really loathe television. I hated the idea that I had to be in my living room, on the couch at a certain time and day to watch the shows I liked. I have been so happy to find that the major networks are hosting their most popular shows online. (although the most recent episodes of LOST have not appeared!!) I have begun watching Desperate Housewives, and am ready for their new season, as well as Brothers & Sisters. The best part is that I can watch them when I want. Woo hoo. That's my kind of TV.

I am working steadily on my script although right now I don't like where it has gone and I am not exactly sure where to go from here. I know that sounds weird - but perhaps if you have written a story you know how it can take on a life of its own, and go places you never really dreamed. Strange. Never a dull moment.

Just Call Me Dorothy or Ms. Pac Man

Tonight the weather is freaky again. There have been tornado cells all around, and as I told my friend Tina I am sitting inside a window under a big tree wearing a hat of foil. How's that for taking chances? I am not cut out for this kind of weather. Give me ice, snow, blizzards - I can take it - but tornadoes - no no no!
I have been pretty busy the last couple of days. I took Kullen to the movies yesterday and we got there about an hour early so we hung out in the arcade. I got totally hooked on Ms. Pac Man - and played it over and over again. I did give the kid a turn or two. We also played air hockey and a Star Trek game where we shot at Cyborgs. You can't have much more fun than that with a 10 year old boy. We liked the Ms. Pac Man thing so much that we stopped at Walmart on the way home and bought one of those little joystick games you can hook up to your TV and played practically all night last night.
I am missing my girls who traveled out of state with a friend. It's always weird when they aren't home - I feel so unsettled.
G'nite from Texas. *click* *click* there's no place like home..... there's no place like home.......

Sandals and Wool Socks

The weather here is so very strange, and after a year and a half of my reporting it, I continue to be dumbfounded. It was in the 3os and 40s a few days ago and today it is in the 70s. It got a bit humid, not too bad. I worked up a sweat while tidying up the house. It was nice to open a couple of windows a little bit and let some of the fresh air in. I even turned on a couple of ceiling fans. One day I'm wearing sandals, and the next wool socks. I am so not used to this - but honestly, I am learning to love it.

SNOW in Texas!!

I am completely overwhelmed. A package came in the mail today from my friend, Ethel to my Lucy, bringing me snow from WV. Yep - when I say SNOW - I mean more like a blizzard. There was a snow-everything. Snow balls, snowmen, tea with a snow theme, snowball gobstoppers. lollipops that were cherry snow flavored, snowman handsoap, a pez snowman, snowflake candy, snowflakes of every size and description, and an amazingly soft snowflake blanket that I am going to use every day and if anybody else touches it they will pull back a bloody stump be severely reprimanded. She sent me a snowflake goblet and has a matching one like it - so we can drink blackberry wine "together". I also got a big huge snowman mug that says "without you.....I'm a drift". For those of you that don't know what a"drift" is - it means the snow is all blowing all around instead of being a snowman. (Thought I'd clarify it down for you southern folk!) This was just amazing - and i am overwhelmed. I wanted to throw the loose snow all over the house - but I just couldn't let myself do it - so the kids and I went outside and threw it all over ourselves. Nope I don't have make-up on yet and it's 2 pm Texas time! I don't know what I did to deserve it - but the Lord only knows how much I needed that love today!

Texas Weather

The weather in Texas is so completely different than I ever thought it would be. Before I moved here, I was under the impression that there were two temperatures - hot and hotter. However, there never fail to be surprises. Of course there are the hurricanes that build up one day in the Gulf and hit the towns south of here the next night, but never really even give us a drizzle even though we are expecting buckets of rain. Yesterday morning I went out on the front porch to feed the dog and cats, and it was so unexpectedly cool at 8 am that I woke the girls up to sit on the porch and sip coffee and share it with me. The weather was pleasant and non-humid all day long. We went for a cookout with some neighbors down the road at one of the national park preserves and took a nice long walk. It was so great to be outdoors and get some fresh air again. Then yesterday evening, I saw that there is another "tropical depression", Ingrid to be exact, that could be headed our way. What a very strange place this is.

What's your weather like?

Ah, Texas!

There really is no other place on earth like it. While I haven't actually traversed the entire earth - I can still tell you - the mold was broken after the good Lord fashioned this lone star state. While I have spent much of the last year wondering what I'm doing here, and how long I can make it (kind of like one of those people on Fear Factor put in a glass box while 50 live tarantulas are released to climb all over them), I have been reading the blog of another homeschooler who was a Texan trying to get back home from the land of Arkansas. She posted a blog earlier today that I just have to link to about how to know when you're in Texas! Check out some of the other links too - good stuff. I have been learning to love Texas vicariously through her!
(Just to clarify - it's not Texas - it's me! This place just isn't my home yet!)

Something's Really Abuzz!

Just a short post to rant about these dang Texas flies! I hate them.... and their 10 gallon hats...... and their stupid spurs..... and the females with big fly hair!

Lips That Touch Wine Will Appear in the Paper

A new concept that I have encountered since moving to Texas is "dry" counties where alcohol sales are prohibited. It is served in some restaurants, but not sold in stores. There are, however, liquor stores built at the edge of the county, making alcohol only slightly more difficult to obtain. Many pastors in our area are rallying to keep this county dry. There is a petition to put the issue up for a vote that is circulating in the county, and the list of those who have signed it will supposedly be published in the newspaper.
This morning we discussed the issue a bit in Sunday School. I remember something the pastor said about a month ago - in essentials unity, in non-essentials, peace. This is not an issue upon which our salvation hangs, and as such would qualify for the non-essential category. Alcohol is not forbidden in the Bible, although God's word clearly forbids drunkenness. I understand completely that as believers that we should stand for righteousness and against wickedness. The alcohol is not the evil thing - but how people behave because they overindulge. I see gluttony as a rampant sin that permeates the body of Christ (four fingers pointing at myself), and yet outlawing chocolate cake will do little to induce righteousness. I don't think you can legislate morality. The difference is that you do not become intoxicated if you eat chocolate cake, and do foolish things that you later regret. It pretty much ends with regretting the chocolate cake. Drunkenness on the other hand lowers inhibitions and makes you far more vulnerable to other sin - you name it.
My husband who grew up in a dry county pointed out that living in a "dry" county seemed to increase the incidence of drunk driving. Those desiring to purchase alcohol would head out across the county line on Friday and Saturday nights to drive-thru liquor stores and start drinking on their way back home.
There are uses for alcohol other than "partying" or intoxication. I have had more than one doctor recommend drinking a small glass of wine for high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and even pre-term labor. (I was in the final trimester and was having some miserably unproductive contractions.) I drink alcohol on a rare occasion, and feel no conviction against doing so. As a Christian, my biggest concern is causing someone who has a weakness towards drunkenness to stumble if they should see me buying or drinking alcohol, so I drink in extreme moderation.
The issue here has become quite heated. This week's newspaper is full of letters from readers, the majority of which are against the sale of alcohol in this county. There is one zealous pastor who takes out huge ads in the paper who seems to be provoking more discord than stirring the hearts of the community towards godly living. I wonder at that, and what the point might be in publishing a list of names that are already on public record. Jesus did not publish the names of the long list of men associated with the woman at the well - that would have been more the style of the Pharisees. I don't know what the right answer is - but I do know that making laws won't help us clean up those whose lives have been destroyed by alcohol. Christ alone can make that difference.

Way to go Texas!

This may not be the absolute best way to support "life" - but at least they are doing something! Texas is going to be voting on a bill to pay pregnant women $500 to choose adoption over abortion. There's more information in this article. I am too tired to coherently think it through - one thing that does immediately come to mind is that women will initiate unwanted pregnancies just for the money. I have heard of worse absurdities than this!

I Don't Know Nothin' Bout Birthin' No Babies

This is our cat Rayne (I call her "Princess Sushi"). The suspicious bulge you see in her mid-section is not too much tuna. This girl is seriously pregnant. We took her to the vet last week because I was worried she may have worms or something and he said we would probably have baby kitties in about 2 weeks. As you can see she is a most gorgeous feline specimen - and we all love her so much. I am about to go crazy worried about her. She is just around a year old. When we got her she was literally a "wild cat". She lived across the street from my mother-in-law's house, behind Uncle Raymond's house. He told me he had a beautiful siamese mixed kitty that we could have if we wanted, and I thought Kaitlyn would adore having a new friend in Texas so we got the kitty for her birthday. Aunt Vonda who is a TOTAL cat lover offered to hold the kitty on the ride home in the car - but the little brier patch hissed, and pawed with claws bared so we decided the kennel was a better alternative. (I could see the leather seats in my new mini van in shreds by the time we made the 2 mile drive!) Kaitlyn fell in love with her and we took turns pulling her out of hiding and holding her and loving her through those first couple of weeks. She is still a bit skiddish - but we couldn't love her any more. We'll have to keep you updated on the kitten saga. She is laying around a lot, and crying (the one "siamese" trait that she has the strongest), so we should have babies any day now. Anybody want a kitten?

Exploring the Big Thicket

Yesterday our co-op group went on a nature trail in the Big Thicket.

thicket - n. dense growth of shrubbery or trees

The woods around here are much different than the woods in the Blue Ridge Mountains where we lived. While each has its own beauty, we are specifically enjoying a closer look at the flowers, birds, and trees in this area. While we were at the Big Thicket Visitor's center, I purchased field guides on wildflowers, birds, trees & shrubbery, and insects (eek!) indigenous to the area.
In my own yard I have a vast amount of trees and shrubs that I know nothing about. The most curious of them was a bush that seemed to have budded and bloomed with these purplish flowers - without a single leaf on the branches. I have never in my life seen anything like it. It also has these little buds that precede the flowers that look like a rabbit's foot. I am not very practiced at looking these things up in the field guides, but it appears to be something called a Skeleton Plant - which would make sense of the leaflessness - and the picture shows similar flowers. What I can tell you is that it caught my attention when it started blooming. Those vivid purplish flowers really catch your eye!
On our hike (I always think of a hike meaning hill-climbing - however, the do call it hiking around here on the flat land!) showed us many other interesting finds. Here are some more:
Some exotic fungi growing on a tree downed by Hurricane Rita

A yellow flower - it was growing on some sort of a vine - I think I have identified it as Yellow Prairie Flax

A young Magnolia - they grow wild here. I can't wait until they start to bloom!

A crawdad hole - which I have never seen in WV!

Now - this is by far the most interesting find of the day. We were hiking a trail called the 'Sundew Trail' that was known for a host of carnivorous plants. This little plant that has the round shape and red tips is the Sundew. It is only about the size of a quarter but we found tons of them once we knew what we were looking for. They were fascinating. Some brave kids touched them and said they left their fingers feeling sticky. That stickiness is what traps the insects that the plant "eats". Another interesting carnivorous plant we saw at the ranger station was the Pitcher plant. I read about it today - the special leaves form a long tube. Nectar inside the straw-like stems attract insects. The insects can crawl in past the hairs in the stems but not back out. Once in the stems the digestive juices help the plant absorb nutrients from the insects. This is not a great picture of them - they are quite fascinating to look at in person.
There are about 20 trails within 10 miles of our house. In fact I was so perplexed by the different kinds of yellow flowers in the wildflower book that the kids and I jumped in the car and went back out to take a look at it today - in hopes of correctly identifying it. I can't wait to check out the rest of the trails. The one thing I hope we do not discover is an alligator or snake! There are tons of them around - as well as - believe it or not wild hogs. Freaky! I have no experience with any of these things. But I am discovering a lot of beautiful nature in Texas.
One thing we learned from a video about the Big Thicket is that this area is one of the best "birding" areas in the US. It is thought that the many species of birds were forced to this area during the ice age. Hmm.... I am going to go and plant myself out there one day just to sit and quietly see what comes to visit. I was also inspired to put up birdseed and hummingbird feeders around my front porch. This place is like a great big science lab.

TEXAS - Prayer Request and a Funny!

We have many family members in Texas right now that we cannot contact by telephone. We are very worried about them. Travis' grandmother is 92 years old, and she is with his parents and aunt, cousin and her three very small children. They are already very tired from being in the car yesterday for 19 hours. My dad just called and said he heard that Lufkin, their hometown was being reported from on CNN and that they are in harms way and should probably be evacuating. We haven't been able to get a phone line to Texas all day. Gas is also in very short supply there. Usually I am glad that I do not have cable - but right know I am only getting bits and pieces of what's happening from others. I will trust in my great big God to protect them. I am asking you to ask Him to take care of them and all the people in danger from this terrible storm tonight.

On a lighter note, one morning this week, Kullen and I were driving Travis to work so that we could have the car for the day. On the way back, on WGTS 91.9, they had an elementary school class saying the Pledge of Allegiance. Having worked with Kullen on that last year, I was coaxing him to say it with me and them. He didn't seem to remember much of it - and so I started in my mommy lecturing way telling him how important it was to know the pledge if you live in America. He is in the backseat, and I was looking at his face in the rearview mirror when he said, "Mom, pretty soon, we won't LIVE in America. We'll live in Texas!" I just cracked up! And I remembered the blinkie that I pasted just above this paragraph!!!! Too funny! I can't wait till he gets to tell Memaw and Papa that one!

House For Sale

House For Sale

Harpers Ferry
3 br, 2 ba walk-out basement, vinyl siding
rancher - great location and quiet neighborhood in beautiful mountain setting
$279,900



This is how an ad for our house might read. There are so many other things it could say, if there were enough lines to tell the story. It could say that we prayed for our own home for ten years before we were blessed to be able to buy this one. At one point in the financing when our loan wasn't looking like it was going to go through, Porky (our pastor) met us, and we sat on the front steps and prayed that the Lord would provide.

I remember the day that we moved in, I have a lap quilt that is very special to me. As the furniture was still being moved in, I hung it on the wall - because it symbolized to me that this was our "home".

Before our financing could go through, there were several things we had to do. We built a railing to go on the back door. Having never built a railing before,I went to the lumber store and asked a hundred questions. I know they were glad when I left. That night, Travis and I put it together.

The day after we moved in, while I was busy unpacking, my girls tied a rope across two trees outside, and made a little tent like structure, spread a blanket on the ground, and had a picnic. The played out there for hours. It was such a joy to watch them enjoying their own yard.

My parents divorced when I was nine, and although there was always a place to call "home", my heart never truly rested anywhere again, until we bought this house. I had been "home"less - so to speak - for about twenty years. I think all of that may make it a bit harder for me to let go. But I know God is teaching me things I cannot know without this journey. I will stay thankful for that, and remember that the memories of my family in this house that became our home will stay forever!