Jazzed

I got some good news today. We are planning - Lord willing and the creek don't rise - to make a trip to WV after co-op ends here in May. It was looking a little disappointing because if we leave after all the stuff that we're involved with here in the Lone Star state - the Country Roads won't be able to take us home where we belong for some very important events, such as the graduation of some of my most favorite people in the world, the formal, and "The Night", a youth gathering. It looks like we'll be able to get there for the graduation and "The Night", but we probably won't make it there for the formal since it is early in May. We are bummed about the formal, but two out of three ain't bad. Not bad at all.
We can't wait to see you guys!!!!!!!! Can you believe it will have been a WHOLE YEAR? Somebody has to come home with me! Any takers?

The Youth Have Left the Building

I was a youth leader for a number of years in WV before we changed churches and then moved. I had participated in many different ministries, helping here and there wherever the Lord moved my heart, but I never found my niche until I worked with youth. It was like my heartstrings started to make music. In the past two years, we have encountered some pretty big life shifts, having moved and being not only in a new state but a different culture. One thing I always come back to is that I enjoy being a part of the lives of teenagers. My daughters and I have talked about this before, but in light of some recent happenings, we are praying about starting a youth group outside any church at our homes a couple of times a month. We were talking about all kinds of "themes" and we came up with The Youth Have Left the Building - it's part of the whole "God Journey" theme of being outside the walls. We don't want to go TO the church anymore, we want to BE the church. Could y'all pray for us on this adventure? I am ready to take the leap.

Everything - -

I don't post videos often, and since I already posted one this morning it may seem that I have spent my day browsing videos - but that isn't the case. I was reading blogs on my Google Reader - one linked to another that I have never been to before, and I saw this video there. I almost didn't watch it - having too much to do, but something continued to compel me to come back and watch it. (Was that you Father?) If you ever take 5 minutes to do anything online, I would ask you to take the time to watch this. Please, you won't regret it.

Lonestar Girls Night

I have a neighbor that I have been getting to know better more recently. She is a nice lady, a bit older than me, but she has a daughter between my girls ages. She has come over for coffee a few times, and I have gone to her house. Her daughter invited my girls to go to a youth rally at her church tonight, and she and I decided to drop them off and go out for a bit. She had to buy a wedding gift, so we went to the World Market store - and I loved it! (It did make me miss my friend Tina, but at the same time made me happy to be doing something that made me feel connected to her!) I got some dark chocolate covered espresso beans! Woo hoo! I also got some breakfast blend coffee beans and added about 100 new items on my wish list. After that we went out and ate mediocre chinese food. It wasn't horrible - but not great either; thankfully the company was good! When we picked the girls up - we went to see if Becoming Jane was playing at the two local theaters yet. It wasn't playing at the first one so we headed out across town. As we were leaving the mall parking lot where the first theater was, we were followed by two motorcycles that revved the engines, causing the three teenage girls hopped up on chocolate covered esperesso beans (bad idea!) to turn around and wave. The first chance they got, they passed us up - and did wheelies and other stunts to show off! We were laughing so hard. Our movie wasn't playing at the second theater either, so we decided to see No Reservations with Catherine Zeta-Jones. It was pretty good. Another food movie like Ratatouille - but without the rats! It was just an all around fun night. I needed it so much - and I had such a nice time. I hope we get to do it again soon. The girls had a great time too!

For Billy

He had huge blue eyes and shaggy dark hair that grew very fast. I know this because the mohawk that he had at the end of 8th grade was gone by the beginning of our 9th grade year. He was my first boyfriend. He liked Motley Crue and squirrel hunting. He had spent most of the 14 years of his life before he walked into mine surviving an abusive father and a permissive mother. Although his parents were divorced, they were very connected until the day his father put a shotgun to his stomach and pulled the trigger. Billy was always sad after that. You would have thought he had been liberated, set free from the evil dictator, but it had quite the opposite effect. The last conversation I had with his dad as we sat alone in the car while Billy and his mom went into the store still haunts me - he asked me to take care of his son. With the pure heart, full of love and romantic notions of being with my 14 year old man-boy forever, I said that I would. I didn't. Billy got very involved with drugs. Instead of overcoming the abuser that had shaped his young life, he became him. Our lives went different ways. I saw him years later and confirmed that we had indeed gone in opposite directions - he was still a 14 year old boy in every way, and I was growing, changing, moving on. When I was 23, married and pregnant with my second child, sitting on the back porch of my cousin's house she announced, "Did you know that Billy Breeden died?" casually handing me a glass of lemonade, as if we were discussing the weather. I completely lost it. I stood straight up and screamed. It wasn't that I still loved him - but I had given an irretrievable piece of my heart to him, never to be recovered. I wish that I had known about Jesus, I know He could have saved Billy from himself. It makes me sad even today to think of how young he died, but more to think that he never really lived. Today was one of those days that he passed through my thoughts. Young love never reached the depths that I know love with my husband, but it forever changed me. I am not that girl whose heart once belonged to Billy, who wore his football jersey and carried books covered with his name, but marked by knowing him all the same. And a word of caution to young ladies who may be reading this - don't give your heart away until you are very very sure that you are giving it forever, cause you can never get all of it back.

I Am Blessed

I will tell you - I fall victim to discouragement from time to time. My general demeanor is positive and upbeat - but there are times when it is hard to keep going. I praise God that He is always the lifter of my head. Generally speaking, it is usually in pressing into His word that I find the cloud of gloom lifting. However, God also uses other people to bless you - to encourage you and give you the added push you need. This week it has happened a couple of times. This Sunday, while perusing the nominees for the Homeschool Blog awards, I discovered very unexpectedly that I was nominated for not one but TWO awards - Best Cyber-Buddy and Best Variety. You could have knocked me over with a feather! It was a true blessing to think that anyone would think such nice things about me.
Then this afternoon in a comment to this post were these words that shook me in the depths of my heart. This is the kind of thing I live for - to love people and make a difference in their lives.

Sometimes I wonder if you ever hurt as much as I do knowing that we can't just meet up at Wal*Mart or taco bell. I wonder if you ever knew what kind of an effect you had on my life. I have been to many different youth group meetings, with many different AWESOME leaders, but for some reason they just can't fill that gap inside of me that you left. I never knew quite how to say thank you, so I just kept my mouth shut. I just really want you to know, that i will never forget you. You were my very first youth leader, you were my favorite youth leader. I miss your voice during worship, you always had a beautiful voice that stood out from the rest.
I hope you will always remember that little goofball in the class.
posted as
Anonymous

Talk about needing tissues. There ain't a blog award in this world that can top what that means to me. I am not certain who this is as there were a couple of goofballs in my life – and I loved every single one of them. If you read this – know that you always have my heart, even here, deep in the heart of Texas! (Please comment here and tell me who you are!)

Ice Cream for Breakfast

This weekend we hosted part of a Mexican themed "progressive dinner" that was hosted for the youth group at our new church. We were the first stop, and from here I was one of the drivers to the rest of the stops. Here is what was on the menu:

Appetizers: stuffed jalapenos, chicken taquitos, taco dip, homemade tortilla chips, salsa, and salsa with sour cream

Salad: taco salad

Main course: Fajitas (chicken, steak or beef) with all the fixins, refried beans, and Spanish rice

Dessert: Fried ice cream

After the whole day of eating, we went to an older lady’s house for a bonfire and hot dogs with marshmallows. WAAAYYYY too much food. My kids and I had never had the fried ice cream the way they made it though, and we all loved it. It was easy to make too so I thought during the Ultimate Blog Party I would share the recipe – which is so simple it’s not really even a recipe – with you so you could enjoy it too.

Simple Fried Ice Cream

Small tortillas
Butter
Cinnamon & Sugar
Vanilla Ice Cream

Melt butter and fry one side of tortilla lightly. Flip tortilla and add a generous amount of cinnamon & sugar. Cook lightly – you want the tortilla to be soft. In warm tortilla add one scoop of ice cream to cinnamon & sugar side – and wrap. Eat up!

It works best if the ice cream is as hard as possible – that way it is less messy. Regardless – it is messy but it is worth it.

I made these for my kids for breakfast this morning! What a fun treat! It can't have any more sugar than cereal or a pop tart which is what 90% of American children ate this morning!

Real Education

I have the awesome privelege of being the youth leader to the junior high crowd at my church. It is an amazing group of kids, and I feel so blessed to get to know them. However, within in this group their are teens and pre-teens from all different kinds of families- some are homeschoolers, some are public schoolers, some have been adopted within the last couple of years out of Russian orphanages, some are friends that come along for the candy. We really have a wide ranging mix.

One thing that I have become concerned about, is not the level of education the kids are getting, but the amount of "real learning" that I think is missing from their lives, and their stunted ability to seek out information if they are interested in something. For example, every week, I present them with a challenge - to find out how much they were paying attention during the sermon from the previous week. It could be as simple as asking what color the pastor's sweater was, or as complicated as asking them to cite a scripture reference, or finish a quotation. Last week I asked them to fill in one word of a quote Porky gave from Ralph Waldo Emerson. During the class, one of the younger students raised her hand - (which thrilled me - I love it when they ask questions - that means they're listening and interested!) - and asked, "Who is Ralph-whatever?" So I gave them an assignment to find out. I wanted them to come in with one simple statement about him.

For a couple of years, I have been explaining to the kids who just recently graduated up to the senior high group that questions are so important. It is so hard sometimes to put yourself out there for embarrassment or ridicule by raising your hand and asking a question, especially as a teenager. I have encouraged them over and over by saying, it is okay not to know - but it is not okay not to WANT to know. Ask the question, and seek the answer until you find it - and to apply this not only to the entire world around them, but passionately to the word of God.

That little sweetheart will never know how precious her raised hand and her question were to me. In our society where we are used to immediate gratifcation, I think she was a bit disconcerted to find that I did not immediately provide her with the answer to her question. But, how much more will I provide them with if I can only plant in their little hearts that spark that sends them hungry on a quest for an answers, and a lifetime of real learning.

Hectic Ecclectic Saturday

Today has been so far just such a mixture of things - I hardly know where to start. I hardly slept last night for worry about my in-laws. I slept with the television on, which is not the most restful way to sleep. I woke up around 6 am with a start, because we had people coming to see our house - which is still for sale - but I thought they were coming at 9 am - and Travis informed me AFTER I got ready that it was between 10 and 11. I checked my email to find out that Travis' family was fine - expecting some bad storms and wind, but not in any eminent danger. (Thank You Lord!) It was such a nice surprise to have a crisp, cool morning. I love it! A friend called and asked me to run to town with her, so I dropped Kullen off to play with a friend, being that he was the only kid home this morning. We went to Walmart and did some shopping - I got an autumn throw with a design of leaves on it. Then I picked the girls and Kullen up from their various locations - and we all went to try out for the play "Miracle on 34th Street" at the local theater. We were the first ones there so it went pretty quick. I didn't audition for any specific parts - but they had me read for about four different ones. I am not sure if I hope I get a part or not. I would really enjoy it - but it would mean we were committed to being here until the 12th of December. It's kind of complicated. While I waited for al lthe kids to audition, I read through a Susan Branch book called Autumn - with recipes, gift ideas, and seasonal suggestions. It was really interesting. This evening, Kendra is having her sr. high youth group friends over for a while - and I am going with Kaitlyn to my friend Tina's house where the jr. high group is having a "Hillbilly Hangout". We are cooking hot dogs on sticks, backed potatoes in the fire, making smores and playing games - and just hangin' around! What a day! I am sure that I will be sleeping well tonight!

I hope you're having a lovely autumn day too!

Precious Prayer

Last night the youth leaders and parents of youth at our church had a meeting to discuss what we're doing, where we're headed, any issues or concerns, etc. Being someone who was called to minister to the teenagers at our church years ago, this ministry is so close to my heart. I care so much about what happens here even once our family has moved on.

Porky had all the youth leaders stand up in the middle of the room, and had all the parents gather around us, lay hands on us and pray for us. It was such a very precious time. To hear the parents thank the Lord for the things He has used each of us to do in the lives of their children was such a tremendous blessing. Sometimes in youth ministry you wonder if you are having any effect at all. Some of the blessings included simple things like creating an environment where their teens like to come to church.

I was second in line for prayer. The prayers of praise to the Lord for how He has used me were so precious and sweet. When Pam, my friend and pastor's wife, prayed for our family and the hole that would be at the Chapel once we've gone, I couldn't hold back the tears, and they lingered throughout the rest of the prayer time. They brought our family and our move before the Lord, someone asked that our marriage would be strengthened through such a strenuous time, and almost prophetically Porky (my pastor) asked that the Lord would be with me when times of discouragement and doubt come, when I am away from my friends and everything familiar, and that I would remember the things He has been showing me.

Ten years ago when I walked into the doors of that little Chapel in the Blue Ridge Mountains, I had no idea what a work the Lord would do in my life. My life was a train wreck. I was 25 years old, with two small children and separated from my husband. What I experienced there was genuine worship. I saw in others something I wanted - which was a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. He planted me in fertile soil, and now He is uprooting me. I pray I will be able to continue to grow elsewhere!

Last night when Porky prayed over me and thanked the Lord for my "faithfulness" it was almost too much to bear. I am only able to be minimally faithful because of His extraordinary faithfulness to me. Thank YOU Jesus!