I share this story of the piercing because it seems to be the way of healing. In this process there are stops and starts. We gain ground and start to feel a sense of wholeness and suddenly and often unexpectedly that same ground seems to drop from beneath our feet, leaving us reeling again. But healing must occur and we must expect that it does not do so in a linear fashion. If we choose to forego the healing process our only option is to remain battered and bitter. It seems not a choice at all to me. Healing is not easy, and it requires that we deal with our scars, but wholeness is always the goal. I read something beautiful recently from Little Bee by Chris Cleave about scars:
"I ask you right here please to agree with me that a scar is never ugly. That is what the scar makers want us to think. But you and I, we must make an agreement to defy them. We must see all scars as beauty. Okay? This will be our secret. Because take it from me, a scar does not form on the dying. A scar means, I survived."I survived. When the bad memories come, the pain creeps to the surface and demands acknowledgment, I remind myself that I survived. These things did not kill me then, and they will not kill me now. Like my piercing, the pain will serve it's purpose. In time, healing will come and with it a beautiful scar as a reminder that I survived.