Mom Advice Needed on Playmates

Living in a neighborhood is a new situation for me as a mom. My children's only playmates used to come to our house because there was an arrangement between the parents to transport the children from one home to another – and there was always an understanding of when the playmates would arrive and when they would leave. Living in a neighborhood has provided a constant stream of companions for my 9 year old son, and at times for my teenaged daughters. There is boy who is here from the second he gets off the school bus until we make him go home – eating dinner with us many nights, and on the weekend he is here in the morning as soon as he chokes down a bowl of cereal. While we enjoy this much of the time, it also starts to wear on you after a while having the door to your house always open with a steady stream of traffic. For instance, this afternoon, my husband who has not been feeling well is attempting to take a nap on the couch – and we just want peace and quiet, and privacy. I honestly don't know what to do. We took the boy to church with us this morning, and dropped him off at home afterwards, and only a few short minutes he was at our house again. I sent him home because my children had some yardwork I wanted them to do, and a short while later he was back. I am not sure where the language barrier is, or where the communication is breaking down.

One thing for certain is that this boy has some emotional issues. Whenever I tell him no about something, he sulks and pouts. I have started to tell him that if he is feeling that he is unable to be with us and enjoy the company, then he can go home. Even after being told no, he will repeatedly ask me something – which is behavior I do not tolerate from my own children, and provokes my son to ask things again to which he has already been given an answer. (Kullen's own fault – but the point is that he is a bad influence in this way.)

Every single weekend he asks to sleep over. I am going to say something that may be unpopular with some parents – but I HATE SLEEPOVERS – especially when kids are young. This particular boy lives only a block away – and I let him stay and play until late – but don't understand the need for him to sleep here at our house. It makes bedtime miserable. It makes the morning chaotic. I am also guarding my son from the late night "chats", and other opportunities for negative influence. I also think that it is rude for him to ask - and have told him if we want to invite him for a sleepover, Kullen and I will discuss that. He seems to have no understanding of how this works, so I try to be patient.

I am really feeling at a loss. I know that it may seem simple – just tell the boy to go home. But, I want to share the love of Christ with him as well. I am just struggling to establish some well-defined boundaries. Any suggestions would be appreciated!

Community Theater

One of the first families I ever met that homeschooled was very involved in the local community theater. I never imagined I would be very good at, or much interested in being on the stage in front of a lot of people. However, I love music. I have been on the worship team at my church for six and a half years now. At first I was extremely nervous. I would literally feel my eyelids twitch, and was sure everyone could see them, my knees would turn to jello, my voice would sometimes crack. Even though my flesh was resistant, I desired to use the voice the Lord gave me to have a ministry in this way - and in obedience, I continued faithfully, until suddenly one day, I realized I was over it.

Last fall, there were auditions for the Christmas play at our local community theater - the Old Opera House for a musical called "Scrooge" - it's basically the story of A Christmas Carol with music. Everytime a musical came around I had toyed with the idea of auditioning. My kids would say, "Yeah, mom, do it with us. Come on!" I would always talk myself out of it because of the time commitment. There were many, many late nights involved. But, when I took my girls to audition for Scrooge, I was sitting in the room while everyone filled out forms, and being in a rather adventurous mood, I decided to just take a shot and see what happens. A couple days later, I got a call-back, and so did BOTH of my girls. We were so excited. We also got Kullen a part as a small boy extra. We worked on that play from late September until performances which were in mid-December. It was a great time - I know a time we'll never forget. One of the reasons this is on my mind right now is that the Christmas play this year is "Miracle on 34th Street" - and even though it isn't a musical, I would like to work on a play again. The auditions are this weekend - and so since nothing is happening with the sale of our house, I might just give it a try.
Here are some pictures of us in the play:

My big scene in the marketplace with Mr. Scrooge - that's me in the red dress - my daughter, Kendra with the purple skirt (peeking out) and white shawl to the right (my left), and the fourth girl over to the right of her, there is a girl wearing black with an orange scarf and brown bonnet - that is my daughter, Kaitlyn. Mr. Scrooge is here collecting money from all the poor shopkeepers who haven't money to pay him and terrorizing the town!

During rehearsals - I have on the gray sweatshirt and black pants in the center of this picture - and my daughter Kendra is on the right.

Here's the opening scene - a "postcard" if you will - we were frozen in order to make the beginning action scene more dramatic. It was a cool effect. Kendra is on the platform on the left (stage right) and Kaitly in in the front on the right (stage left) and I am just above her on the right platform steps.

This was a wonderful experience - and if you are able - I would HIGHLY recommend participating in community theater in your town. We had such a great time - it was a time I'll never forget! My kids also learned a lot about theater and literature and sharpened a skill that homeschoolers are often weak on - making friends and loving like Jesus loved people that are very different from you.