Showing posts with label patience. Show all posts
Showing posts with label patience. Show all posts

07 July 2007

Sucking the Life Out of Me

I don't like to rant about my children, and what little ogres they can be. Honestly, God spared nothing in this mother's heart of affinity and affection for her offspring but there are days when you can at least relate with the animal mothers that eat their young. Tonight was one of those nights for me. I was very excruciatingly sleepy around 8 pm but was visiting with family and did not get in bed until closer to 11 pm. My 9 yo son was staying up with his sisters and cousins and friend, and asked if he could wait a while to go to bed - so I said he could come to bed at 11:30 but not to wake me. Then somewhere around 11:30 as I was just starting to doze off, he came in and leaned over my sleeping body and asked if he could stay up just a little bit longer - they had gotten into some game and he wanted to finish. I said alright, but NOT to wake me again. At 12:30, I saw the room where I was sleeping was lit up, and heard a loud buzzing sound - and found my son had turned on the light and had started a nebulizer (used for breathing treatments for asthmatics). It was his cousin's and he just wanted to check it out. I asked him WHAT on earth he was doing. He must have realized he had provoked some sort of murderous rage, and turned everything off and left the room. I laid there angry, unable to just drift back to sleep, when the realization hit me that it was almost 1 am and he is still awake and that whatever game he had been playing was obviously over. I am tired, angry and ever so frustrated at the inability to get this child to understand how hateful it is to wake someone when they are sleeping. I have two children that have no regard for this, and I am not sure how they have gotten the idea that whatever they want to do is more important than a person's rest. I stormed out there and drug his little butt to bed. He listened to me as I explained that tomorrow I have to function without having had enough sleep and he apologized. I am trying to consciously parent my children the way the Lord parents me, but the thought crossed my mind a little while ago - as I lay in bed too frustrated to sleep again that God doesn't experience sleep deprivation. I hope He will help me be patient, as He is always patient with me. I have never woken Him up - but I know I have grieved His heart.