I had a discussion with my dad today wherein he took issue with homeschooling. Several times recently while discussing some changes going on in our family, it has been said that I needed to "put the kids in school". It really sucks that when I'm already down and out, feeling somewhat vulnerable is when people in my family from whom I most want love, acceptance and support, have chosen to use it to coerce me into the lifestyle they think I should have. Nothing doing.
In our conversation, it was asked if the kids were going to "sit around the house all day?" Is that really what people think we do? Perhaps if these people spent some time with us in our world, they would know better. My kids have always had friends and activities and engagements and lots of social outlets. I don't understand the small thinking that "socialization" is something learned in schools and not in the society at large.
I work hard to respect and love my siblings and the choices they make for their kids. I try to show my step-mother respect for what is important to her as a school secretary. Is it possible I could receive a little of this in return? Can we disagree and choose different things without making value judgments on one another? My kids are amazing, and it is really about damn time that they acknowledge it. If one of my nieces and nephews were shy - they would not blame the public schools. Don't blame homeschooling for my children's personalities. Don't blame homeschooling because they choose to sit with adults or their siblings instead of hanging out with a bunch of whooping, hollering teenagers who they think are idiots. Don't blame homeschooling because my kid doesn't care to play sports. Don't blame homeschooling for everything you think is wrong with my kids - who asked you to evaluate them anyway? Why do we all have to be gray - can't some of us have some color of our own?
When it comes down to it - I will never give up my choices for my family to live the way we see fit. That price is too high. I don't need anything if it comes with strings attached.
Showing posts with label education. Show all posts
Showing posts with label education. Show all posts
30 December 2008
11 July 2008
A Nice Little Story
One of my favorite unschooling books is called the Teenage Liberation Handbook. Last night Kaitlyn started asking some questions that were sparked by the very methodical education plan that one of her friends is on, and I read this first part to her called A Nice Little Story. It is a great illustration about how our attempts to teach can often squander, even kill a real love of learning. Those things fleshed out in the realness of everyday life are a real education, and the rest is often just jumping for paper fruit. Read it, you'll understand.
FYI - because somebody always tends to react - I do not endorse the site or any of the content therein - only this one story from Grace Llewellyn's book, "Teenage Liberation Handbook".
09 June 2008
Unschooling: A Work of Heart
One day I might write an ebook with this title. Since our family took the leap into the great unknown of educational freedom, life has never been the same. Recently on an unschooling list, someone asked about what a typical day looks like in our homes. The problem with such a question is that it almost never looks the same. Some days are rather lethargic - people reading, zoning out on the computer, playing video games, watching movies. There are days and days at a time when the TV doesn't go on - although the warmer weather drives us inside and that seems to peak this time of the year.
Kendra is an avid writer. Those are her plans for the summer - to write. She got a good start by handwriting letters to some of her friends. She got stocked up on supplies - making the purchase of a 3 ring notebook, paper and is currently in pursuit of dividers.
Kaitlyn is always creating something. She and Kullen have been playing a lot of Nancy Drew mysteries on the computer. She finished a painting she was working on and has recently begun to design her own chart of personality traits, and how the zodiac influences that. Let me restate that we believe the magnetism of the universe, the placement of the stars and how that affects all living things is the design of the Creator. No worries about witchcraft here.
Kullen has a new hatchet that Uncle Robert gave him when he and his dad went to visit the elderly uncle. Kullen adores him, and I am sure that this will be a prized possession for years to come. A few days ago, he plunked Gray's Anatomy book down in front of me and wanted me to help him look up the spinal cord. Something about Quasimodo piqued his interest in abnormalities. The book he chose was a bit too technical, so we borrowed Kendra's Biology II book that specifically targets anatomy. He learned without teaching how to use the index and research different parts of the body and has been telling me some of the fascinating things he's learned.
I find it fascinating that the kids are free to pursue their own interests as much or as little as they want. I love it that they can dive into things they would be told in school they would have to wait for a few years, or take it much further than the overview they might get. I love it that they can explore and develop their natural gifts without a teacher telling them they are doing something wrong - and find those things that don't work naturally with trial and error.
I know that there are a lot of other kids in various forms of "schooling" who do these things as well. Homeschooling allows students far more time for pursuing personal interests than traditional schooling does, but often I find these children locked into rigorous "elective" schedules often much more catered to the interests of their parents than their own and have little time to follow their own bliss. A lot of these kids don't even get a break from these rigors in the summer.
This time of year, I start hearing the chatter in the homeschooling circles about the next "school" year. The year hasn't ended for us - it lasts all year long. We're sticking with unschooling - all the way baby!
Kendra is an avid writer. Those are her plans for the summer - to write. She got a good start by handwriting letters to some of her friends. She got stocked up on supplies - making the purchase of a 3 ring notebook, paper and is currently in pursuit of dividers.
Kaitlyn is always creating something. She and Kullen have been playing a lot of Nancy Drew mysteries on the computer. She finished a painting she was working on and has recently begun to design her own chart of personality traits, and how the zodiac influences that. Let me restate that we believe the magnetism of the universe, the placement of the stars and how that affects all living things is the design of the Creator. No worries about witchcraft here.
Kullen has a new hatchet that Uncle Robert gave him when he and his dad went to visit the elderly uncle. Kullen adores him, and I am sure that this will be a prized possession for years to come. A few days ago, he plunked Gray's Anatomy book down in front of me and wanted me to help him look up the spinal cord. Something about Quasimodo piqued his interest in abnormalities. The book he chose was a bit too technical, so we borrowed Kendra's Biology II book that specifically targets anatomy. He learned without teaching how to use the index and research different parts of the body and has been telling me some of the fascinating things he's learned.
I find it fascinating that the kids are free to pursue their own interests as much or as little as they want. I love it that they can dive into things they would be told in school they would have to wait for a few years, or take it much further than the overview they might get. I love it that they can explore and develop their natural gifts without a teacher telling them they are doing something wrong - and find those things that don't work naturally with trial and error.
I know that there are a lot of other kids in various forms of "schooling" who do these things as well. Homeschooling allows students far more time for pursuing personal interests than traditional schooling does, but often I find these children locked into rigorous "elective" schedules often much more catered to the interests of their parents than their own and have little time to follow their own bliss. A lot of these kids don't even get a break from these rigors in the summer.
This time of year, I start hearing the chatter in the homeschooling circles about the next "school" year. The year hasn't ended for us - it lasts all year long. We're sticking with unschooling - all the way baby!
07 December 2007
Respect for Children
One of the reasons - one amongst millions we have chosen not to institutionally educate our children, is because of the ability the "system" has to make your children into a number, part of the pack, a face in the crowd. I remember being traumatized in middle school because my pants split all the way down the seam and the teacher would not let me call my mom - in fact she told me to return to my seat. I have seen other kids wet their pants because they were denied a bathroom break, or told they didn't need a drink of water. When you discuss these things with certain people you get the attitude that these kinds of things prepare children for the "real world". I don't know about you, but as an adult, nobody prevents me from using the restroom when I need to, or getting a drink if I'm thirsty. Aside from wanting our children home with us so that we could be their primary influence, and as parents have the opportunity to guide their hearts towards the Lord, we never wanted them to have to endure the humiliation that can be heaped on children who are not thought of as individuals with thoughts, wants, dreams and real physical needs.
Too late.....
I wasn't going to blog about this, but I think I have to since blogging is therapy. I am working on forgiving which was another reason for the hesitancy, feeling that this story will enrage others, and thus fuel the anger, instead of the aiding my quest towards letting go of what could grow into a very large resentment.
My son was sent out of his PE class at co-op the other day. I was surprised to find him sitting in the office when I went into a back office to print off the Mom's Notes newsletter that is one of my duties. He followed me and said, "Mom, I got sent out of PE." I said, "Why?" He said, "Mom, I don't know."
As a mom, I'm thinking that something is missing to this story, but I know my son. I know what he is capable of, and yet, I have also known adults to be unfair, unkind and even *gasp* wrong. I started asking what he was doing. His class was doing some sort of aerobic work out which is very cardiovascular. He said that he started to feel that his chest was tight, so he went to the side and sat out. I asked him if he was disturbing the class, he said no. I asked him if he was doing something the teacher asked him not to do, he said no. About a dozen more questions of everything I could think of that he might have possibly done to deserve the most serious disciplinary action we can take at the co-op - and all answers "no".
Let's back up a bit and clarify that he is severely asthmatic. He was sick the previous week with a cold, getting up in the middle of the night for breathing treatments, and taking his inhaler frequently through the day. The PE coach was informed about this at the beginning of the year, and seemed very agreeable and on board with letting him stop whenever he needed to. I explained to her then that we let HIM say when HE needs a break - we don't qualify it because he is really the only one who knows his body.
Fast forward to this day, I tried to find the coach to discuss this with her. I even called her at home and on her cell phone that evening, and could not reach her. This was Monday, and finally on Wednesday morning, I was able to get in touch with her. Our conversation started with her saying this, "I think we have a spiritual issue here."
I took a deep breath. I hate it when people over-spiritualize everything. We are spiritual beings, and everything we do is spiritual - but there seems to be this hocus-pocus mystical thing that goes on where people weigh and judge one another in this realm. Ugh.
I let her speak. I listened.
My summation of what she said is that she thinks my son uses his asthma to sit out when he doesn't want to do something. I asked if he disturbs the class. No. I asked if he disobeys something when she specifically asks him to do something. No. I asked if he is disrespectful to her. No.
She said on the day in question that he had gone to the side and sat out, and then laid down on the floor. I asked her if she asked him to sit up. She said no, she didn't have time to stop and do that. What she did have time to do was walk over to him and tell him to "get up and go to the office" - and he said she was angry.
She said he sits out when they do something hard - but participates in the things that are fun. I asked her what the hard things were. Aerobics or heavy work-outs. I explained that asthma, being a respiratory illness would respond more severely to these types of things and make his refraining more legitimate - not that I think on any planet near or far, I need to prove this to her.
She said that this has been bothering her all year, and yet she has not said one word to me or Kullen. She hasn't ever said that she thinks he gives up too easy or that he could try harder.
In any case, I am thankful that she did not push him to continue the activity. However, I am very concerned that she feels it is her place to evaluate whether he is having a legitimate issue with his asthma or not.
The coach is a first year homeschool mom. She doesn't really "get" homeschooling yet. She told me she has been very frustrated and feels that homeschooled kids all think they can do what they want, whenever they want, and that they will be ill-prepared for the real world. Again, I refer you to the first paragraph here - where I ask you what bodily functions would be denied, or told we were using chronic illnesses to "get our way", or were forced for that matter to participate in an athletic activity we did not choose. What is "real world" about that?
Anyway - I have talked to the appropriate people, and have a little peace that they are keeping an eye on the situation. But in my heart, I am so frustrated that people get away with treating children in a way we would never treat another adult. I am furious that my son was discriminated against because of an illness, and that someone would think it is their place to assess his "spiritual condition". I am humiliated for him that he was sent without his shoes to sit in an office when I deal with other kids in class throughout the day who are displaying willful disobedience who are at least given a warning. He was sent out without a clue as to what he was doing wrong, and taunted as we went to our car by an obnoxious boy in his class. I feel a bit helpless that as important as this was to me that we were not able to protect him from this kind of situation.
I need to get past this. I know I need to forgive. Any thoughts or suggestions on how I do this? If the same thing had been done to me, I'd be over it already, but do it to my child and we have a different dimension of anger, frustration, and resentment to deal with - the Mama Bear kind.
Too late.....
I wasn't going to blog about this, but I think I have to since blogging is therapy. I am working on forgiving which was another reason for the hesitancy, feeling that this story will enrage others, and thus fuel the anger, instead of the aiding my quest towards letting go of what could grow into a very large resentment.
My son was sent out of his PE class at co-op the other day. I was surprised to find him sitting in the office when I went into a back office to print off the Mom's Notes newsletter that is one of my duties. He followed me and said, "Mom, I got sent out of PE." I said, "Why?" He said, "Mom, I don't know."
As a mom, I'm thinking that something is missing to this story, but I know my son. I know what he is capable of, and yet, I have also known adults to be unfair, unkind and even *gasp* wrong. I started asking what he was doing. His class was doing some sort of aerobic work out which is very cardiovascular. He said that he started to feel that his chest was tight, so he went to the side and sat out. I asked him if he was disturbing the class, he said no. I asked him if he was doing something the teacher asked him not to do, he said no. About a dozen more questions of everything I could think of that he might have possibly done to deserve the most serious disciplinary action we can take at the co-op - and all answers "no".
Let's back up a bit and clarify that he is severely asthmatic. He was sick the previous week with a cold, getting up in the middle of the night for breathing treatments, and taking his inhaler frequently through the day. The PE coach was informed about this at the beginning of the year, and seemed very agreeable and on board with letting him stop whenever he needed to. I explained to her then that we let HIM say when HE needs a break - we don't qualify it because he is really the only one who knows his body.
Fast forward to this day, I tried to find the coach to discuss this with her. I even called her at home and on her cell phone that evening, and could not reach her. This was Monday, and finally on Wednesday morning, I was able to get in touch with her. Our conversation started with her saying this, "I think we have a spiritual issue here."
I took a deep breath. I hate it when people over-spiritualize everything. We are spiritual beings, and everything we do is spiritual - but there seems to be this hocus-pocus mystical thing that goes on where people weigh and judge one another in this realm. Ugh.
I let her speak. I listened.
My summation of what she said is that she thinks my son uses his asthma to sit out when he doesn't want to do something. I asked if he disturbs the class. No. I asked if he disobeys something when she specifically asks him to do something. No. I asked if he is disrespectful to her. No.
She said on the day in question that he had gone to the side and sat out, and then laid down on the floor. I asked her if she asked him to sit up. She said no, she didn't have time to stop and do that. What she did have time to do was walk over to him and tell him to "get up and go to the office" - and he said she was angry.
She said he sits out when they do something hard - but participates in the things that are fun. I asked her what the hard things were. Aerobics or heavy work-outs. I explained that asthma, being a respiratory illness would respond more severely to these types of things and make his refraining more legitimate - not that I think on any planet near or far, I need to prove this to her.
She said that this has been bothering her all year, and yet she has not said one word to me or Kullen. She hasn't ever said that she thinks he gives up too easy or that he could try harder.
In any case, I am thankful that she did not push him to continue the activity. However, I am very concerned that she feels it is her place to evaluate whether he is having a legitimate issue with his asthma or not.
The coach is a first year homeschool mom. She doesn't really "get" homeschooling yet. She told me she has been very frustrated and feels that homeschooled kids all think they can do what they want, whenever they want, and that they will be ill-prepared for the real world. Again, I refer you to the first paragraph here - where I ask you what bodily functions would be denied, or told we were using chronic illnesses to "get our way", or were forced for that matter to participate in an athletic activity we did not choose. What is "real world" about that?
Anyway - I have talked to the appropriate people, and have a little peace that they are keeping an eye on the situation. But in my heart, I am so frustrated that people get away with treating children in a way we would never treat another adult. I am furious that my son was discriminated against because of an illness, and that someone would think it is their place to assess his "spiritual condition". I am humiliated for him that he was sent without his shoes to sit in an office when I deal with other kids in class throughout the day who are displaying willful disobedience who are at least given a warning. He was sent out without a clue as to what he was doing wrong, and taunted as we went to our car by an obnoxious boy in his class. I feel a bit helpless that as important as this was to me that we were not able to protect him from this kind of situation.
I need to get past this. I know I need to forgive. Any thoughts or suggestions on how I do this? If the same thing had been done to me, I'd be over it already, but do it to my child and we have a different dimension of anger, frustration, and resentment to deal with - the Mama Bear kind.
17 October 2007
$96.72 for What???
I was telling my husband earlier today how much groceries cost. Actually I was telling him how the prices have soared in the last year or so. It is crazy. I am spending close to $150-200 a week depending on what we eat. This particular week, I thought I'd save us some money and empty out the pantry - using up all the canned goods, etc. that we have in there and finding recipes to utilize these ingredients. The picture to the right shows what I bought. If you'll notice - I did not buy any meats except lunch meat. I buy organic milk and some name brand items, but for the most part, I buy store brands. I also bought some Tootsie Pops to have on Friday to and from the concert for a treat (instead of stopping at convenience stores for junk!) and some card stock that is actually for co-op tomorrow. The total came to $96.72. I almost fainted.Here is a list of what I bought:
2 - 1/2 gal. organic milk $3.68 each -Clorox bleach $1.88/gal - men's deodorant $2.07 - women's deodorant $2.74 (explain to me why mine is higher than hubby's???) - Toothpaste $3.47 -gallon sized freezer storage bags $1.12 - Card stock $3.88 - Apple Jacks $2.74 (a treat) - 1 pint sour cream $1.34 - 1 can navy beans $.64 (these were advertised on the shelf for 50 cents - so I was overcharged) - Saltines - $.87 - Coffee $4.96 - Butter $2.28 - 2 pkgs lunch meat $2.98 each - Tootsie pops $4.88 - Wisk $9.48 (have to buy HE detergent for the front loading washer that is supposed to be saving me money in electricity) - Downy $4.97 - Macaroni noodles $.50 - Chicken broth $1.00 - 1 can diced tomatoes $.54 - 1 pkg pop tarts $2.42 - Lipton tea bags $2.12 - Flour $1.58 - 2 pkgs oysters at $1.17 - Pepper jack cheese $2.12 - Shampoo and conditioner (good stuff - we have bad hair) $5.84 ea - Roma tomatoes - $.56 - Grapes $2.57
These things without what is already in my pantry would NOT feed us for the week - these are just the odds and ends.
Oh and on a bit of a homeschooler rant - while we were at Wally World - there was a local elementary school class there on a "field trip"!!!! Do NOT get me started here - but why on earth do elementary school students in rural America need to go on a field trip to Walmart?? Most of them practically live there. Their families spend their whole paychecks there. It defines their culture. They are all wearing the same clothes because everybody shops at Walmart. And they were not being instructed in any way whatsoever, they were descending on the store like a plague of grasshoppers, running everywhere, knocking over merchandise and blocking aisles. Oh brother.
17 August 2007
Real Learning
The co-op we joined this past week is such a delight. The people were so welcoming and friendly. Kendra blogged about it here. We were all so happy, deep inside like when you know something is right, something "clicked". The girls chose to nix Economics and high school Geography, but they both opted to take English, 20th Century Literature, Biology, Art and Drama. I was surpised that Kaitlyn was choosing to take Biology, having always liked science, but always shying away from a challenge, but choose she did. This week as she has worked on Module 1, she has had all sorts of questions, and been challenged in many new ways. Yesterday she was struggling with a question, and asked for my help. We stretched out across my bed and read the section together, and talked about it - and I couldn't give her the answer. Not I wouldn't - I couldn't. But here was the best part - in all our the ways our philosophy of education and how people learn has changed over the past couple of years, I had to tell her that it was okay to say "I don't know" for both of us. She has an opportunity if she chooses, to learn, really learn. We talked about how important it is to learn for the sake of learning - and not to let anyone else pressure her to feel compelled to focus on getting the "right answers" but to press on for the joy of studying something of interest. I told her that it might be helpful for the other kids in the class if she is willing to say she doesn't know or understand and to ask the question that everybody else wants to know but is too afraid to ask. Life just keeps presenting opportunities to learn. My job is to facilitate them with whatever they choose to learn. It is so awesome and liberating not to have to have all the answers, but to be a fellow student with them in the school of life.
18 July 2007
Instincts and Obligation and an Update
Well, first things first - my husband a/k/a the Fabio version of the computer geek - only without the long hair and without the rest of his body waxed of every hair - managed to get everything (we hope!) off of the hard drive on my computer. Hewlett-Packard is sending me a Fed-Ex box with shipping paid so I can send it to their repair center. I hope that we get this problem eradicated before the 1 year warranty of the darn thing is up. It must be something special about me - I do indeed have the opposite of the Midas Touch when it comes to electronic devices.
Now on to my regularly scheduled thoughts this evening:
Right now it is 10:15 pm, and Kendra decided a short while ago that she wanted to make a Chai cake she found in a recipe book yesterday - the chai flavor being her favorite and all. She asked if she could - and I hate to say it but I really struggled to say yes. You see, I am learning to live free - and accept that my kids need to live in freedom in order to blossom into the individuals that God made them to be. For Kendra, her optimum, peak-performance time is night. It has been since she was a baby. What upsets me is that I have to fight everything in myself so hard to allow them this freedom. I don't want a mess, or the noise, or the questions that will come with baking an unfamiliar recipe. But what my daughter needs to do is create - try her hand at something new. I grew up with an early bedtime, waking up every morning to the demands of an alarm clock or someone else's idea of what I should do and when, making my bed before I left my room, and following "the plan". This is very responsible, and there are likely quite a few of you reading this thinking, "what on earth does she think is wrong with that?" This routine may create an obedient, well-regulated, societally oriented person, but it will never facilitate the extraordinary. When I was in high school my life was school and work. I was a talented writer - but my homework assignments, even in the creative writing class that I loved, were delegated to an item to cross of the never-ending list of things that I was obligated to do. There was no joy, no searching out the world around me with wonder.
I watch television shows like the Gilmore Girls and see the college bound Rory that I adore, however, I find it supremely unrealistic. Rory is involved in about a zillion extra-curricular activities, has breakfast every morning before catching the bus with her mother at the local diner, participates in everything that is going on in the community, has a boyfriend, a best friend and reads constantly - not light reading either - Russian authors, and classics like Shakespeare, all while maintaining a grade point average to keep her at the top of her class. I am sorry but no real human can maintain all of that - but yet most of our society models their lives after what they see on the boob tube. I imagine many families watch the Gilmore Girls and feel inferior because their kids and families aren't doing all of that.
What I want is to create space in our lives for my kids to grow, branch out, try their wings. It is counter to everything I have ever learned. It reminds me of learning to breathe - it should come naturally - but when we are anxious or under pressure - we tend to hold our breath. I have been holding my breath my whole life waiting to learn this lesson - for them and for me. It is what unschooling is about - inhale - exhale - inhale - exhale.
Now on to my regularly scheduled thoughts this evening:
Right now it is 10:15 pm, and Kendra decided a short while ago that she wanted to make a Chai cake she found in a recipe book yesterday - the chai flavor being her favorite and all. She asked if she could - and I hate to say it but I really struggled to say yes. You see, I am learning to live free - and accept that my kids need to live in freedom in order to blossom into the individuals that God made them to be. For Kendra, her optimum, peak-performance time is night. It has been since she was a baby. What upsets me is that I have to fight everything in myself so hard to allow them this freedom. I don't want a mess, or the noise, or the questions that will come with baking an unfamiliar recipe. But what my daughter needs to do is create - try her hand at something new. I grew up with an early bedtime, waking up every morning to the demands of an alarm clock or someone else's idea of what I should do and when, making my bed before I left my room, and following "the plan". This is very responsible, and there are likely quite a few of you reading this thinking, "what on earth does she think is wrong with that?" This routine may create an obedient, well-regulated, societally oriented person, but it will never facilitate the extraordinary. When I was in high school my life was school and work. I was a talented writer - but my homework assignments, even in the creative writing class that I loved, were delegated to an item to cross of the never-ending list of things that I was obligated to do. There was no joy, no searching out the world around me with wonder.
I watch television shows like the Gilmore Girls and see the college bound Rory that I adore, however, I find it supremely unrealistic. Rory is involved in about a zillion extra-curricular activities, has breakfast every morning before catching the bus with her mother at the local diner, participates in everything that is going on in the community, has a boyfriend, a best friend and reads constantly - not light reading either - Russian authors, and classics like Shakespeare, all while maintaining a grade point average to keep her at the top of her class. I am sorry but no real human can maintain all of that - but yet most of our society models their lives after what they see on the boob tube. I imagine many families watch the Gilmore Girls and feel inferior because their kids and families aren't doing all of that.
What I want is to create space in our lives for my kids to grow, branch out, try their wings. It is counter to everything I have ever learned. It reminds me of learning to breathe - it should come naturally - but when we are anxious or under pressure - we tend to hold our breath. I have been holding my breath my whole life waiting to learn this lesson - for them and for me. It is what unschooling is about - inhale - exhale - inhale - exhale.
16 July 2007
Some "School" Stats
I don't post about "unschooling" much, per se, because it is a philosophy of life. There aren't lesson plans, lists to cross off, or things to do. We learn as we live - so in that sense I guess I am posting about it all the time. Today, I was listening to the news as I was getting dinner in the oven, and heard this statistic - that school children forget as much as 60% of what they learned the year before over the summer vacation. The reporter was suggesting that parents find opportunities to sneak "learning" into their children's summer fun. There are also those who are "school/education nazis" that would have children going to institutionalized schools all year long in order to help them retain what they are learning. I want to be slow to criticize because I used to think much like this. I am so thankful that I know my children are learning all the time through life and living.
04 April 2007
Drivers License Test - Take 1
Tomorrow my oldest baby will be 16 years old. She was eligible to get her learners license last April, however we put it off until after we moved. Once we moved to Texas, she had to complete their "parent taught" drivers education course, which I could not order until I got MY Texas license. I got that in the fall, the ordered the packet - which we got in November. We made a long trip to WV, then there was Christmas and one thing after another until here we are - almost to her 16th birthday. I woke her up this morning and told her I was going to take her to take the test to get her permit. "But MOM, I haven't studied." I asked her if she'd read through the book, which she had, and then I told her if she didn't pass she could just consider it a practice test. She missed one more than you were allowed to miss, and so we go back next week for her to retake it. No biggie. It's not a secret. She doesn't have that serious sense of failure that I would have had in a similar situation, and I have to wonder if the difference is her personality or the fact that she's been homeschooled most of her life. We have similar personalities so I would lean more towards the latter.
As she was testing, I realized something as I watched her sitting at that little desk, struggling to concentrate through the ADD in a chaotic office, knowing that she would have been medicated heavily throughout elementary school or held back so her teachers could manage to make the child walk in line or not have to assist her in keeping up with her backpack - I realized that as a mother, my goal has been to teach her how to drive. What the state wanted was for her to "take a test". While I understand it is necessary to have some gauge in measuring the whole of society to determine road-worthiness of the individual, most of what was on her test had NOTHING to do with actual driving. She said about a third of the questions were about the amount of fines incurred for specific offenses such as DUI, etc. What does that have to do with driving I ask you? There are no sour grapes here - it just smacks of the stupidity of the system. There are some who may be able to recite the fines forwards and backwards - but whether or not they should be on the road remains to be seen. I think this is another HUGE piece of evidence that points toward what a warped idea we have as a society of education.
A month or so ago someone sent me this link of a song by Tom Chapin called "Not on the Test". It is a humorous look at what I'm talking about here. Hope it gives you a chuckle. On the homefront this week is to learn how to bend your brain around "the test"!
After all this ranting, I do have a warm fuzzy to share with. As Kendra and I were walking up to the DPS office for her to take her test, I said, "I just want to hold your hand and walk you in there like it is your first day of kindergarten." A few seconds later, this precious little hand - not much smaller than my own now, reached down and grasped mine. She may be almost 16 but she's still my baby!
As she was testing, I realized something as I watched her sitting at that little desk, struggling to concentrate through the ADD in a chaotic office, knowing that she would have been medicated heavily throughout elementary school or held back so her teachers could manage to make the child walk in line or not have to assist her in keeping up with her backpack - I realized that as a mother, my goal has been to teach her how to drive. What the state wanted was for her to "take a test". While I understand it is necessary to have some gauge in measuring the whole of society to determine road-worthiness of the individual, most of what was on her test had NOTHING to do with actual driving. She said about a third of the questions were about the amount of fines incurred for specific offenses such as DUI, etc. What does that have to do with driving I ask you? There are no sour grapes here - it just smacks of the stupidity of the system. There are some who may be able to recite the fines forwards and backwards - but whether or not they should be on the road remains to be seen. I think this is another HUGE piece of evidence that points toward what a warped idea we have as a society of education.
A month or so ago someone sent me this link of a song by Tom Chapin called "Not on the Test". It is a humorous look at what I'm talking about here. Hope it gives you a chuckle. On the homefront this week is to learn how to bend your brain around "the test"!
After all this ranting, I do have a warm fuzzy to share with. As Kendra and I were walking up to the DPS office for her to take her test, I said, "I just want to hold your hand and walk you in there like it is your first day of kindergarten." A few seconds later, this precious little hand - not much smaller than my own now, reached down and grasped mine. She may be almost 16 but she's still my baby!
12 November 2005
Unschooling Moments
Yesterday was one of those days when it was extremely clear to me that my children are truly learning all the time - if I will invest myself enough to be present with them in whatever it is we are doing, and take the learning opportunities that are present. But, even without me, on their own, they desire to learn and life presents a multitude of opportunities. One such opportunity occured in the car on our way to rehearsal at the theater. We were listening to a Rascal Flatts CD, and in one of the songs phrases such as "you're a waterfall washing over me", "you're a mountaintop, when I reach for you your love lifts me up", and "I am frozen ground, you're the warm sunlight". As I was listening I realized that in this song, they were using, over and over, a literary device called a metaphor. Wikipedia defines it this way: Metaphor is language we use to compare things, but without using "like" or "as". I told the kids and some friends that were in the car, and we tried to see how many we could find. This was much more exciting than sitting in Grammar class, with a worksheet, tediously circling the metaphors and underlining the similies for a class period!
Another incident was also spurred on by music in a ZoeGirl song. (Yes, we listen to a wide ranging variety of music!) The singer is asking God to take away her superficial focus and help her concentrate on the beauty within. Kaitlyn asked me what "superficial" meant. This led us into a discussion about things that appear one way on the surface and are often very different inside.
It was a great reminder that they are, to coin a John Holt phrase, "learning all the time"!!
Another incident was also spurred on by music in a ZoeGirl song. (Yes, we listen to a wide ranging variety of music!) The singer is asking God to take away her superficial focus and help her concentrate on the beauty within. Kaitlyn asked me what "superficial" meant. This led us into a discussion about things that appear one way on the surface and are often very different inside.
It was a great reminder that they are, to coin a John Holt phrase, "learning all the time"!!
06 October 2005
Real Education
I have the awesome privelege of being the youth leader to the junior high crowd at my church. It is an amazing group of kids, and I feel so blessed to get to know them. However, within in this group their are teens and pre-teens from all different kinds of families- some are homeschoolers, some are public schoolers, some have been adopted within the last couple of years out of Russian orphanages, some are friends that come along for the candy. We really have a wide ranging mix.
One thing that I have become concerned about, is not the level of education the kids are getting, but the amount of "real learning" that I think is missing from their lives, and their stunted ability to seek out information if they are interested in something. For example, every week, I present them with a challenge - to find out how much they were paying attention during the sermon from the previous week. It could be as simple as asking what color the pastor's sweater was, or as complicated as asking them to cite a scripture reference, or finish a quotation. Last week I asked them to fill in one word of a quote Porky gave from Ralph Waldo Emerson. During the class, one of the younger students raised her hand - (which thrilled me - I love it when they ask questions - that means they're listening and interested!) - and asked, "Who is Ralph-whatever?" So I gave them an assignment to find out. I wanted them to come in with one simple statement about him.
For a couple of years, I have been explaining to the kids who just recently graduated up to the senior high group that questions are so important. It is so hard sometimes to put yourself out there for embarrassment or ridicule by raising your hand and asking a question, especially as a teenager. I have encouraged them over and over by saying, it is okay not to know - but it is not okay not to WANT to know. Ask the question, and seek the answer until you find it - and to apply this not only to the entire world around them, but passionately to the word of God.
That little sweetheart will never know how precious her raised hand and her question were to me. In our society where we are used to immediate gratifcation, I think she was a bit disconcerted to find that I did not immediately provide her with the answer to her question. But, how much more will I provide them with if I can only plant in their little hearts that spark that sends them hungry on a quest for an answers, and a lifetime of real learning.
One thing that I have become concerned about, is not the level of education the kids are getting, but the amount of "real learning" that I think is missing from their lives, and their stunted ability to seek out information if they are interested in something. For example, every week, I present them with a challenge - to find out how much they were paying attention during the sermon from the previous week. It could be as simple as asking what color the pastor's sweater was, or as complicated as asking them to cite a scripture reference, or finish a quotation. Last week I asked them to fill in one word of a quote Porky gave from Ralph Waldo Emerson. During the class, one of the younger students raised her hand - (which thrilled me - I love it when they ask questions - that means they're listening and interested!) - and asked, "Who is Ralph-whatever?" So I gave them an assignment to find out. I wanted them to come in with one simple statement about him.
For a couple of years, I have been explaining to the kids who just recently graduated up to the senior high group that questions are so important. It is so hard sometimes to put yourself out there for embarrassment or ridicule by raising your hand and asking a question, especially as a teenager. I have encouraged them over and over by saying, it is okay not to know - but it is not okay not to WANT to know. Ask the question, and seek the answer until you find it - and to apply this not only to the entire world around them, but passionately to the word of God.
That little sweetheart will never know how precious her raised hand and her question were to me. In our society where we are used to immediate gratifcation, I think she was a bit disconcerted to find that I did not immediately provide her with the answer to her question. But, how much more will I provide them with if I can only plant in their little hearts that spark that sends them hungry on a quest for an answers, and a lifetime of real learning.
29 September 2005
Homeschooling Priorities
I just read an blog entry on Lifetime Learning about Teens Going to College-Revisited. The blogger referenced an article about a 13 and 14 year old brother and sister duo going to UC Berkeley. I think that sometimes media like this tends to put a lot of pressure on homeschooling families. I've discovered that throughout the homeschooling community there are different reasons people choose to homeschool - therefore making goals and priorities in educating our children at home falling on quite a wide scale. When I first started to homeschool, I had never met and couldn't imagine that anyone that was not a Christian would want to homeschool their children. In ten years my world has opened up dramatically - and I have met homeschoolers from all walks of life, with varying lifestyles. It is good. It always challenges me to think about what I am doing, and why I am doing it.
I know some that would be absolutely sick with grief if their children chose not to go to college. Education is security they would say. For me, Jesus is the only sure thing - and my trust is completely and solely in Him. In my heart, I want my children to follow God's plan for their lives, wherever that may lead them - to college, to China, to a husband or wife, to the inner city, into a specific ministry, and most importantly to having a heart that always says "wherever-He-leads-I-will-follow"! How could I ever assume to take His place in their lives??? My goal, my focus, what matters most to me is not my children being math geniuses or knowing how to diagram an intricate sentence, but giving them the necessary tools so that they will have the skills to do whatever He asks them to do.
What are your priorities in homeschooling your children? I would love to hear them!
I know some that would be absolutely sick with grief if their children chose not to go to college. Education is security they would say. For me, Jesus is the only sure thing - and my trust is completely and solely in Him. In my heart, I want my children to follow God's plan for their lives, wherever that may lead them - to college, to China, to a husband or wife, to the inner city, into a specific ministry, and most importantly to having a heart that always says "wherever-He-leads-I-will-follow"! How could I ever assume to take His place in their lives??? My goal, my focus, what matters most to me is not my children being math geniuses or knowing how to diagram an intricate sentence, but giving them the necessary tools so that they will have the skills to do whatever He asks them to do.
What are your priorities in homeschooling your children? I would love to hear them!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)